Priceless Princess

The heart of a woman has been created delicately, yet the strength and passion of Christ holds her heart in perfect peace. With Christ, the heart of a woman can withstand the storms of life. She comes through even more radiant, elegant, and beautiful!

Psalm 45
"The King is enthralled by your beauty; honor Him for He is your Lord... All glorious is the princess within her chamber; her gown is interwoven with gold. In embroided garments she is led to the King"

Some people are only in our lives for a moment in time. Some cannot go with you into the next seasons of your life. This does not change the beautiful, elegant, priceless princess that you are in Christ. He cherishes you and loves you beyond what you can imagine. Your destiny is still in place. Your steps are still ordered and ordained of God. The actions of others do not affect the purity and light of Christ that shines in and through you. It was never intended for the actions of others to dim the light of Christ in you. Stand strong, stand firm! Do not look to the left or let your mind wonder to the right. Keep your focus on Christ ahead of you. Keep walking! Keep moving forward! Pray and believe God to open doors of friendships and people who see the gifts and talents within you. Praise your way through the midnight hour. Though it’s easier said than done! But in the morning your deliverance is coming! Your joy will be restored!

-Thank you Jesus! Create in us, Your daughters, the hearts of virtuous women so that we may enter Your chamber as You usher us into Your Presence. Amen!

Who's Played a Game Called: Comparing?

We received a VERY good question from a grad recently asking a very big question that concerns all of us:

“How do you gain victory, and long lasting freedom from comparing and playing the comparison game?”

We felt that this question was best answered if we all three answered it from our own perspectives. Comparison works in different ways through different minds, so we wanted to give you three different ways victory comes for us. No one way may work for you, you may have to have trial and error to find your fit, that’s what we want to show you through this special post.

Kristen:

Reflecting His Image

There are different ways in which a person may compare themselves to others: comparison of outward appearance, comparison of inward qualities and talents, and comparison of opportunities and careers. When we begin to look around us and compare ourselves to others, we can very easily feel inadequate- as if we don’t measure up. This only causes negative feelings and thoughts that can literally steal the life out of us. This is exactly what the enemy wants because these negative emotions and thoughts can steal, kill, and destroy the very dreams that God has placed within your heart. This is why He says, “above all else, guard your heart, for it is the wellspring of life. Put away perversity from your mouth; keep corrupt talk far from your lips. Let your eyes look straight ahead, fix your gaze directly before you.” (Prov. 4:23-25 NIV) The way to overcome the negative emotions and comparison is to speak out-loud His truth about yourself and to keep your eyes gazed upon Him at all times. His truth will guard your heart from the destruction that the lies of comparison will cause.

                In my own personal life, I allowed myself to look at other people and tried to reflect their “beauty” instead of opening His Word in order to reflect His TRUE beauty. His beauty does not change or fade away with each season of fashion. “From Zion, perfect in beauty, God shines forth” (Psalm 50:2 NIV). It’s so much easier to look around and compare ourselves to others. However, each one of us is uniquely created with different talents and abilities for a specific purpose. Follow the dreams within your heart so that you will become successful and effective as you reflect His image.

Lauren:

The Power of Your Tongue

Comparison is my number one enemy! No matter what it is I seem to compare it, or make it a competition. Whether it’s from the way someone looks to the way they hold their pencil (ok, that’s a bit dramatic). I have a very black and white personality, so I tend to take things to the extreme. That is no different in my process of healing.

If I am dealing with feelings about comparing my body with others or picking on certain areas, I have to be very extreme with my way of dealing with it. So (DON’T LAUGH), I stand absolutely bare naked in the mirror and speak life over myself. I call out those areas and my body and say that I am the temple of the Living God! I am molded and formed by the hands of God and I am prefect in his eyes. I have a list, and you can make you own! As silly as it may sound, as works! And it takes time, but it works!

As for long term victory, you have to make a long term commitment to love yourself. Comparison roots itself in insecurity. No matter what it is about it is because you are not happy with who you are! You have to speak to those parts of you and bring them to life with your words! Take pride in what you can do and do it to the utmost importance and for the glory of God. Only words spoken from your mouth can expel lies that are rooted in your mind! And it works in the opposite way as well, only lies spoken from your mouth can be rooted in your mind. So when someone says something negative against you, don’t repeat it to yourself, because that is when it latches on to you! God said the power of life in death is in YOUR mouth! WOW! Words can kill you or keep you alive! So what are you going to speak over yourself, speak life! Have life all around you! Post life on your mirror, post life on your rear view mirror (but don’t rear end someone while reading it ;) ) You will have to do this all of your life! As long as evil is on this Earth comparison and lies will come to you, but as long as life comes forth from your mouth, you will live in the victory!

Britney:


Comparison is like poison. It seeps through our mind, body, and emotions, often leading us to make poor choices. I used to have a PHD in comparing myself to others. I found myself having all sorts of unhealthy motivations for it. First, I wanted to be more like someone else because I was struggling in my own identity. Secondly, I was trying to find some motivator to change myself. Third, I wanted to belittle myself and find any fault I could because I was struggling with a lot of self-loathing. This truly is a dangerous cycle, and one that God does not want us to be in. There are different things that have helped me over come this issue. I had to begin to root myself in my own identity. This is a combination of soaking up all that God says about me and learning more about myself as a person. And I'll say that just because we spent time learning our identity in Christ at Mercy, does not mean that we don't need to keep renewing our mind to this truth for the rest of our lives! The other side was that I needed to spend time on me! I had to ask myself "What do I like to do? What brings me joy? What are my giftings? What are my talents? What do I have to offer? What makes me unique?" It is so important that we develop this self-awareness because it begins to protect us from this deadly self-comparison. Understanding your uniqueness and knowing that it is beautiful is one of the most powerful weapons to fight the comparison issue. Think about this: If God wanted another "Susie (generic name!)" then He would have created two, right? If God wanted you to look like Marcia, think like Allen, study like Betsy, dance like Jean, preach like Patrick, look like Lucy.... then He would have crafted you that way! But He didn't because you are your own beautiful masterpiece, created in the image of God. The other important factor is to know your weaknesses, and see them in the proper perspective. Think of a physical body as a metaphor for the body of Christ. If all the fingers tried to be eyes, the body wouldn't function correctly! My weaknesses are actually a HUGE blessing, because not only do other members of the body of Christ get to come along side me, creating Godly community, but also because that is where I find God's strength blossoming so beautifully. So check your perspective of your mistakes and work on moving to a place of self-acceptance! Blessings to all of you! Love your sister in Christ, Britney

About the Author (Pt. 3) Lauren's Story

Growing up I was constantly around anger. Everywhere I turned there was anger, either from my parents, my friends, even babysitters. Ranging from very minimal to extreme, but seemingly constant. I too was an extremely angry child, raging on the inside, stuck and afraid to express exactly what I felt. All the anger grew into hatred, mostly for myself. It only made sense that everyone was so angry and so upset because of me. When my parents divorced when I was seven, I had already decided in my mind that it was my fault. I didn’t want to be in the way anymore. Later in life I developed an eating disorder mostly from self hatred and feeling like I never measured up. All of it planted in hatred, anger, and rebellion. I lost a lot of weight very quickly and got very sick, deathly. I didn’t care. That’s what I wanted anyways…to die. I started self harming at a softball game when I got angry at myself and could not go on an immediate bout of over exercise, so I discovered cutting. A whole new world opened up to me, a very dark one. From there it all only got worse. Between strange obsessions, rules, rebellion, an eating disorder and self harm, I was dying…fast. In and out psych units, I was done. I was determined nobody could help me, and I didn’t want anybody to, so no professional tried anymore. My parents desperate and trying to accept what I was doing to myself… just couldn’t. They kept trying by getting me back into rehab, and the last time, Mercy found me. I applied and went to Mercy thinking I was going to beat the system. I hated God along with everything else in my life.

The Mercy staff did everything but hate me. They loved me to the death of myself. I died in November of 2007 at Mercy and ever since I have been living with Christ in a whole new world of light and freedom. I know freedom is easy to accept but not easy to live in. It’s a choice everyday and even harder choice to make when you don’t “feel” like it. That is why my heart is for Mercy grads. I know what it’s like to be tempted beyond anything ever experienced before, I also know what it is like to be more than a conqueror and watch what God can do if only we let Him. I still have “issues”, as well all do, but I know that I serve a God who is able to walk us through the storm! I know a God who has promised to be with us always and to give us a peace that surpasses all understanding. I know a God who loves us so much that He gave His very own flesh and blood, perfect Lamb of God to be slain with the murderers and sinners just so He could adopt us. We are His and He is ours and that is my heart to share with you! That you may see and know that we are here for you to help you walk out the purposes God has for you in your life with complete and total freedom!

I love you girls and I am so excited to be walking through life with you!

About the Author's- Britney Rowland

From Ashes to Beauty

(Britney’s Story)

God's perspective and His truth have come to mean everything to me. His truth has set me free, and He continues to redeem every moment of pain, trauma, and loss I've experienced. One reason His perspective means so much to me is because my vision and perception had been so skewed because of abuse I faced in my life. In response to years of trauma, I created a list of rules that changed my life in a very negative way. Most devastating of these life altering rules was to not speak. From age ten till a couple months into Mercy, silence was a protective hideout for me where I thought I was safe inside my secrets. I played mind games and got lost in dissociation until I no longer knew what was reality. On the inside I was frighteningly suicidal and self-destructive. I hated myself and considered myself to be a monster. I cannot even count the amount of suicide attempts I took on my life. All I know is by the grace of God, I kept waking up the next day. When I began my life changing journey at Mercy, God gave me a vision of Him following me around and as I took the overdoses, He reached into my stomach and took them out. And I truly don't doubt that He did, because I know that I shouldn't be alive. When I walked into the doors at Mercy, I started one of the most challenging, yet rewarding journey's I'd ever embark on. The transformation was slow and steady, but God took the impossible and made it possible. The secrets began pouring out and God began healing my heart. He taught me the importance of speaking the truth with my powerful words. He changed my perceptions of Him, of myself, and of life itself. I once had a life that I could no longer bear to live. Now I have a life that I am passionate to live for the Kingdom of God. He truly turned my mourning into dancing and gave me beauty for ashes. And praise be to God, He continues to!

Since Mercy, God has opened the doors to many amazing adventures. I have a heart for missions and have spent considerable time on the mission field. God has blessed me to be able to serve Mercy Ministries by giving my testimony and volunteering at events. Currently I am a student at William Jessup University finishing my degree in Psychology/Community Mental Health. I have a huge heart to mentor and encourage other grads from the program. It is a unique experience to transition out of Mercy, and I think in many ways we are best equipped to serve and encourage each other. That is my heart for this blog... to serve my sisters.

God Bless you all, and hope to hear from you.